One of the most important figures in people’s lives is their mother. No individual will be here today without her. The depth of a mother’s love is unconditional. Her sacrifices in bearing and bringing her children into this world fosters a unique bond with them. When people lose their mother, they are in for a rough journey and a devastating time. The connection between children and their mother is incomparable. Read more
Regardless of whether you know the deceased or not, death always has a way of leaving us at a loss for words. Gathering your thoughts and writing down to express your condolences on paper is never easy. Though you don’t know the deceased, you are doing this act of kindness for the ones left behind who feel a massive loss over the death of their beloved.
Mustering up the words to show your sympathies for those in mourning is very challenging. However, don’t let your apprehension deter you from giving a sympathy card during the funeral ceremonies. It may be difficult to find the right words to say, especially if you don’t know the deceased personally, but it is not an impossible task to accomplish. If you need a burst of inspiration, consider the following ideas, to help you finish writing your sympathy card.
Keep It Simple: Go with the Classic Lines
If you don’t know the deceased and you are grasping at words not knowing what to say, here are four words for you: just keep it simple! Go with the classics. Some say they are generic clichés, but they are dubbed this way for a very good reason. They are short and straight to the point. Try the following lines: “I am sorry for your loss,” My condolences,” and “My deepest sympathies.”
These statements sum up your thoughts but do not diminish your intention. They let the bereaved know that they have your full support in a concise manner. Sometimes, it’s best to keep things short. You don’t need to write and dedicate a whole novel, just a simple gesture like sending a short note written on a card paired with a beautiful bouquet is enough to console the weary hearts who are pining for a deceased loved one.
Try Ennobling Words Taken from Songs or Poems
At a loss for words? It is okay to borrow them from another person and give due credit, of course. Take some of your favorite inspiring lines from a song or a stanza of a poem. There are many funeral poems or songs out there for you to take inspiration from. Though the words are not yours, the thought is still there.
When you write this in your card, it still very much comes from your heart. These words will hopefully uplift the mourning family members and comfort them as well. The important thing here is you are able to relay your heartfelt sympathies. It is never easy to lose a loved one, so showing your support during this very trying time is crucial.
An example of a popular funeral poem is the Warm Summer Sun written by the classic author, Mark Twain in 1896:
Warm summer sun,
Shine kindly here,
Warm southern wind,
Blow softly here.
Green sod above,
Lie light, lie light.
Good night, dear heart,
Good night, good night.
Choose Some Inspiring Quotes
Similarly to sharing lines from a poem or song, quotes effectively convey the emotions that you feel in a short and direct way. Choose insightful quotes that serve as reminders that there is hope after death. This is an ideal method to express how you’re feeling at times when nothing seems to make sense. Reading the quotes on the nature of love, life, and loss will help uplift the spirits of the bereaved.
Quotes are great reminders and mantras to keep in your life. Share quotes that are dear to you to make the message more personal. Examples of popular quotes are:
- “Death is not extinguishing the light. It is putting out the lamp because the dawn has come.” -Rabindranath Tagore, artist and writer
- “There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved.”-George Sand, author, real name Amantine Lucile Aurore Dupi
- “Lives are like rivers: Eventually they go where they must. Not where we want them to.”-Richard Russo, screenwriter, and author
Include Drawings and Doodles
If you are a fairly creative person who is not very eloquent in expressing yourself in words, do not be afraid to tap into your creative side. An unconventional yet great way to express your sympathies on the card is by drawing or doodling. After all, art is also a medium of expression and considered a form of language.
You may draw the family’s portrait, or draw something symbolic to the grieving family. Do they like animals? Doodle a dog hugging its owner. There are no limits when it comes to your imagination! Let your creativity flow. The most important thing is to show your sincerity and allow your feelings to surge freely from within. As long as your intention is good, your artistic work need not be filtered because this depicts your honest feelings.
Sympathy cards have always been written to console and comfort the bereaved. It does not matter how many words you are able to pen on paper, but what’s important is how you relay your emotions and condolences. It’s not how much you say, but how you say it – straight from the heart. Be genuine and allow yourself to express what is truly inside your heart.
We all know that it is burdensome when people have to prepare funeral services for their kin. This task becomes even more difficult when a parent has to bury a child. Such a tragic notion goes against the natural law of life. After all, younger children are always expected to outlive their much older parents. Anyone who has gone through this heartbreaking experience will tell you that when a child dies, a part of your adult spirit dies along with them.
Death in itself takes a toll on those who are left grieving, most especially if the life that is lost was born from your own flesh and blood. Nothing can ever prepare a parent for this tragic fate. Though it seems unlikely as the circle of life opposes this concept, sadly, losing a child can still happen. How then, are parents supposed to cope when the unthinkable happens? Here are some suggestions to help you and your kin move on from the death of your most beloved child.
Rely On a Strong Support System
A good and strong support system is part and parcel of healing. When the world feels as if it is conspiring against you, there’s no shame in asking for help. Besides, your loved ones are surely more than willing to help you out with your responsibilities. Even just their presence and listening ear is already a great source of comfort. This maybe your family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, or even strangers in a support group. It is easier to cope with difficult times when there are people around to guide, comfort, and uplift you. Having people who listen and genuinely care for you will help you manage your loss.
Go On a Sabbatical
When your emotions are in turmoil, a sabbatical is a great way to find calm and peace. Take time off from work and your usual daily routine to grieve. You may go on a hike or go out of town for a weekend. Spending time away from home gives you a chance to rest your weary heart and mind. Grieving is a painful process that drains energy, especially when you see nothing but funeral flowers or other painful reminders of your loss. Sometimes, a change in the environment can help you cope with the pain. Being away from a sentimental place that you associate with your late child may make it easier for you to process your burdensome emotions.
Get Started On a New Hobby
Finding a new hobby is a great way to redirect your grief. Trying out new things will means channeling your feelings into a healthy coping mechanism. It is better to convert your grief into a positive outlet. The hobby doesn’t have to be fancy to be effective. It can be a simple task like baking, sewing, painting, or engaging in sports. Releasing your pent up feelings will do your body and mind a world of good. Keeping yourself engaged provides a sense of calm. Hopefully, you will be able to ruminate and reevaluate your life. A concrete output resulting from creative expression feels rewarding. It allows you to reclaim your life, instead of being consumed by grief and sorrow. Activities help you let go, so you don’t wallow in self-pity and bitterness.
Seek Professional Care
Grief can be understandably overwhelming, especially when the loss of your child is sudden and tragic. If it becomes unbearable and difficult to handle even with the help of the aforementioned coping tools, it is better to seek professional counsel. Finding solace with a psychologist or therapist will help you understand your difficult emotions. You may be feeling confused, anxious, and depressed at the injustice of your situation. Talking with a counselor arms you with coping tools to process what is going on. Acknowledging your loss a therapist’s guidance will allow you to grasp your situation fully, so you can handle things with grace.
Spend Time in Prayer
Should you believe in religion, one effective way to help you manage your child’s loss is to spend time in prayer. When you lift your feelings to your deity, you are unburdening your heart, mind, and soul. As such, you take a huge load off your chest! Spending time in prayer will help you reflect on your situation, giving you hope, providing peace, and allowing you to come to terms with your emotions.
Losing a child is never easy, but it would also be a huge disservice to your child’s memory if you do not let go and move on with life. Your child will not rest in peace if live the rest of your life in perpetual sadness. A child will never want to be the reason for his or her parent’s sorrow. The most beautiful thing you can do is to live a beautiful life in your child’s honor.
The death of a loved one is an unimaginable loss for many of us. The unfathomable uncertainty of death and the pain it leaves in the hearts of the bereaved leaves a void that cannot be filled. The gloominess and melancholy that ensue can be turbulent for the family and friends of the dead. To alleviate the heaviness of the atmosphere and reach out to the mourning individuals long after the funeral services are over, you may give them gifts and presents. Though this will not measure up to the gravity of their loss, at least you might, in some small way, make them feel a tiny bit better. Here are a few things that you can gift to people who mourn the demise of a loved one. Read more
We have all lost someone near and dear to us to a thief called death. Sadly, dying is an inevitable part of life that no one can escape. Apart from the pain directly caused by the loss, planning a funeral can take its toll on the immediate family. It is hard to write the death announcement, along with figuring out the details of the ceremony.
Whether it is a long term illness or a sudden demise, death is difficult to accept, and healing will take time. Losing a loved one has the potential to affect the lives of the bereaved greatly. It manifests in the physical and emotional aspects, sometimes with a lasting impact. Read on to understand how death can affect a family and why it is important to be kind, patient, supportive, and understanding to those who are grieving.
1. Children grow up without knowing their loved one
When a person experiences losing a loved one as a child, this can have many long term psychological effects. A child who has lost a mother or father will grow up with a missing piece because of the absence of one parental figure. This can lead to personal issues like self-identity crisis and difficulty establishing healthy relationships with people.
Studies show that children who were not able to process the death of a parent properly grow up with abandonment issues. They search for love and comfort elsewhere. They look for substitutes and may end up in the wrong relationship. Guidance is paramount for those who lose a parental figure to ensure that kids grow up in the right direction.
2. Can cause strain on relationships
Grief-stricken people often need time to process pain and emotion correctly. If the grief is not managed and handled properly, this can lead a person to feel heavy issues and volatile feelings that become an emotional baggage. One who cannot move on from the death of a family member may have difficulty maintaining other relationships because of emotional instability.
When one is moody or depressed, it can lead to withdrawal. This can, in turn, cause miscommunication and misunderstandings. Unfortunately, these things have the power to create rifts in family ties and can even sever relationships. The death of a loved one has the potential to divide a family without proper grief management. This can be avoided if a family consults a specialist or copes through healthy methods like holding open discussions or dialogues to provide an avenue for emotional expression.
3. May affect the lifestyle
There is no doubt that a family member’s death can drastically alter the household’s routine, priorities, and overall lifestyle. To many, losing a family member will cause a significant change in family dynamics, particularly if the deceased is the household’s breadwinner. How do you pay for your mortgage and basic needs when no one is earning? This poses a difficulty to grieving family members since it would mean making adjustments in spending habits and lifestyle choices.
In addition, this also means rearranging schedules and changing routines, which many bereaved family members find challenging to do. If the missing family member is used to picking up the children to and from school, who will be tasked to do it now that the person is gone? The life of the ones left behind is forever altered when their loved one passes on. As such, it is crucial to have a good support system. If you know someone in a similar situation, now is the time to offer a helping hand.
4. Posses a huge financial burden
Burials and cremation services cost a large sum of money. For many families around the world, this expenditure is too big a cost to bear. Often, people are caught off guard when someone dies, so they are ill-prepared. Families are shattered financially by a loved one’s death, especially if they find cannot afford it. Those who do not have insurance plans find themself using up their savings. This leaves the bereaved with a heavy financial burden that can strain their lifestyle and relationships with one another.
With this in mind, the heads of families need to perform proper planning, which involves getting the right insurance coverage, conducting estate management, and procuring funeral investments ahead. When you plan for the future, you secure your family in case of an emergency or other unforeseen circumstances. The last thing any person should be worrying about when someone dies is the financial aspect so that they can grieve in peace!
It is normal for family members to react differently when they experience a closed loved one’s death. As individuals try to cope with changing roles, it can result in complicated emotions and untoward behavior. While each person is going through their journey, it can be difficult to connect with one another. The important thing to remember is always a beacon of hope that will readily offer support during these trying times.
Though every person knows that death is an inevitable part of human existence, it is still hard to come to terms with it, especially when the person you love is the one that passes on. This is a tumultuous period that inflicts pain, suffering, and sadness on the bereaved family and friends. After planning a funeral, it feels tragic to go back to an incomplete home where the glaring absence of the deceased is felt. How does one move on after all the funeral ceremonies are done? Read more
Just like adults, children react to death in various ways. This could be influenced by a myriad of factors such as their age, gender, relationship with the one who died, family circumstances, personality, development stage, amount of support given to them, earlier experiences, and how the others around them are grieving.
Always remember that grief is a natural response to a loss, and losing the person you love is complicated. It is even harder for kids who don’t have the emotional maturity, depth of experience, and ingrained wisdom to handle such trying times. Grief has no time table, so you must always be ready to reassure your children and give them comfort. Read more